Exodus 20:12
“Honor your father and your mother…”
While God desires humans to worship him, along with giving him proper respect in obeying him, he also wants what’s best for his human creations as well: and that includes knowing and (hopefully) doing the right things and having a good, proper, and loving relationship with other humans. And since pretty much all humans had to be born to exist (apart from the first known humans ,Adam and Eve, who were directly created by God) every single human has a mom and dad (even if they have never meet them) that they came from and (hopefully) raises them as their first humans he/she will ever meet in the world. So, The very first place to start concerning human relationships is with a human’s own parents in their own family in properly showing honor to:
Exodus 20:12
“Honor your father and your mother,…”
Leviticus 19:3
“Each of you must respect your mother and father,…”
This is also one of the only Ten Commandments that God gives a blessing if its obeyed by a human:
if obeyed a human would be blessed with living a long and blessed life!
Exodus 20:12
“Honor your father and your mother, so that you may live long in the land the Lord your God is giving you.”
So God promised in this command that if a human honored their father and mother he would bless them with a long life; it is revealed later by God and Moses that God himself would give this long life by his own power to those who obeyed his commands (or laws; including honoring your father and mother):
Exodus 23:26
“...I will give you a full life span.”
Moses says he is life because he is the one who allows a human to live:
Deuteronomy 30:20
“…love the Lord your God, listen to his voice(commands/laws),…For the Lord is your life, and he will give you many years…”
Deuteronomy 6:2
“…keep…all his decrees and commands that I give you, and so that you may enjoy long life.”
Moses later says this same command (and blessing):
Deuteronomy 5:16
“Honor your father and your mother, as the Lord your God has commanded you, so that you may live long and that it may go well with you in the land the Lord your God is giving you.”
So, while it’s true that obeying all of God’s commands/laws lead to a joyful long life as a blessing from him, obviously since mentioned together by God himself (and Moses) this blessing is especially connected to honoring parents and shows, as human relationships go, this command is very important to God!
So, God makes it clear that it’s pretty important to honor your parents.
But what exactly does honor mean? And how do you exactly honor your mother and father?
“honor” means 'to show high regard to something or someone in someway', but the original word used here is“כָּבַד”(kaw-bad) meaning “to be heavy or weighty,” this word can be used either in a bad way (like burden) or in a good way (like in respecting something) in this specific case this honor basically means respect:
That is regarding something or someone highly and treating them/it in a serious manner [1].
Specifically with respecting parents, to respect (honor) parents, a child should treat their parents as wiser older humans responsible (or once responsible) for their care and learning.
This means a child should not treat their parents formally (treat and talk to them casually like a friend: this does not mean a child cannot be friends with their parents; especially if their adults, it just means that a child should not be treating their parents like their friends and as their equals; they are not equals with their children they are over their children in status and are to be respected!) but treat them with respect and obey and listen to everything they say. And a child should obey everything they say (as long as what they tell them is not sinful) and should not be lashing out at them in anger or disrespect or even just ignoring them.
While the Bible does not give a reason in this command to why children should honor their parents it’s not too hard to see why it’s not only the right thing to do but it's very natural:
Their (biological) parents are the reason they exist.
A child's parents are the very reason they exist in the first place: a child is literally a combination of their parents D.N.A. and cells and if it wasn’t for their (biological) Mom and Dad they would not be here! (of course, God also made it possible that they exist as well) For this reason alone, a child should show honor to their parents for their very existence!
Their parents own them and are responsible for their care, protection, and learning.
Even if the parents/guardians raising a child are not their true biological parents, they still take one the same role as a biological parent would: because both biological parents and parents of adopted children (should) take on the responsibilities of caring, protecting, and raising the child. Because they love them, protect them, teach them, and care for them, the child naturally should show respect to their parents.
This is revealed later in the Bible that a child honoring their parents is natural
Malachi 1:6
“a son honors his father,…”
It’s natural for a son to honor/respect their dad, a daughter to honor/respect their mother:
A child to respect their parents!
So the reason a child should honor/respect their parents is many, but there are many more reasons to honor your mother and father:
A child’s parents are the first (human) relationship they will ever have
As said before, this is the very first human relationship a child will most likely ever have and will make or effect how all other future relationships with other humans will be. So the first human relationship they have with their parents should be a positive and healthy one to teach them by example how to have other positive and healthy relationships with other humans later on: Because honoring your mother and father teaches a child’s natural place in the family and society:
Honoring parents gives an example to honoring all older human family members
It teaches a child to show proper honor to other older family members like their grandparents (the parents of their parents), aunts(the sister of their parents), uncles(the brother of their parents),and even their older siblings like an older brother or sister in a certain respects (and if their an older brother or sister they are in turn to be properly respected by their younger brother[s] or sister[s]).
and all other elders/seniors in society
It not only teaches a child to respect older family members but also teaches a child to have proper respect for all older humans ( and especially elderly adults: that is about 50-60+ years old) in society: God does command younger humans to show proper respect for older humans; even in they are not direct family members:
Leviticus 19:32
“Stand up in the presence of the aged (standing up in the ancient middle east was away to show respect and acknowledgment for someone), show respect for the elderly…”
And finally teaches respect for those in possessions in leadership, power, and/or authority
It not only teaches a child respect for older humans in society but also teaches respect for people who are rule over them/lead them (like their parents) who are in charge of (and hopeful do try to) look out for their safety, care, and well-being:
This means your teacher(s), your Judge(s), your boss(es)/manager(s), mayor(s), president(s), pastor(s) etc. all deserve proper respect and acknowledgement from those who are under their authority:
A citizen should honor their king/leader because their leader is their master/ruler and deserves their honor/respect:
Psalms 45:11
“…the king…honor him, for he is your lord(master).”
Like it’s natural for a son to honor his father, It’s also natural for a servant to honor his master:
Malachi 1:6
“a son honors his father, and a servant his master.”
A young kid will most likely first encounter this in school by their teacher and should properly learn to honor and obey their teacher and learn from them since they (hopefully) are trying to teach them knowledge and wisdom they can use later: this teaches them to respect and obey other people in leadership positions
This leads to a stable society as a whole when proper respect is shown and thus chaos and disorder (and violence) is diminished. This also might have been a part of why God said if a human honored their mother and father, they would live a long life: in a stable and healthy society it's easier to live a longer life!
The final lesson to learn from honoring parents.
To ultimately Honor our heavenly father: God
while this is mainly a guild to beginning correct and healthy human relationships starting with the core family, it also ultimately a law that is also about preparing a human to show proper respect to their ultimate parent/father and master God:
Even the command to honor your father and mother ultimately goes back to honoring God!
Because God himself is a father also: he is a father to his people Israel since he personally formed them (like a father/parent would) and also desires honor from his children Israel as well as for being the master/ruler of Israel and all of reality as well:
Malachi 1:6
“A son honors his father, and a servant his master. If then I am the Father, where is My honor? And if I am a Master, where is My reverence?”
But how does God want honor from his human creations does he just want them to worship him and pray to him? He reveals he desires honor by obedience to all his commands including worshiping him alone and respecting him:
Ezra 10:11
“...Now honor the Lord…do his will.”
And this includes honoring parents and elderly in society:
Leviticus 19:32
“…show respect for the elderly…revere your God.”
And If he is honored by you he will honor (bless) you back:
1 Samuel 2:30
"...Those who honor me I will honor..."
And one of the way he blesses humans back is by blessing them with a long joyful life!
An Important lesson for young kids (and all humans) to learn as soon as possible.
While its important for all humans; kids (that is about 1-20 years old) and adults (that is about 20+ years old) to always honor their parents if they are still alive, It’s especially very important for young kids(that is about 1-6 years old) who are still very dependent to and being raised and cared for by their parents and thus under their authority to learn to and eventually honor their parents, because more than adults, kids actually are still under their parents authority and this is the time for them to begin to practice respecting their parents as soon as possible so they can learn to ultimately respect all elders and authority in society and (hopeful) get prepared and learn to ultimately respect the greatest authority God almighty so they may be blessed with a great long life and a more peaceful orderly society.
(Back to The Ten Commandments)
Sources:
[1]
[A] Merriam-Webster “Honor”
Website:
https://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/honor
[B] Exodus 20:12 Hebrew interlinear from Biblehub
Webiste:
https://biblehub.com/text/exodus/20-12.htm
[C] Strong’s Hebrew concordance--3513. “כָּבַד” (kaw-bad')--to be heavy, weighty, or burdensome by Biblehub
Webiste:
https://biblehub.com/hebrew/3513.htm
[D] Merriam-Webster “Respect”
Website: